It trips me out how relationships change over the years, and from time to time I like to think about certain relationships and the evolution they have gone through to get where they are today. This morning I woke up thinking of my sister, mainly because we’re packing up the whole fam bam tonight and headed down to San Diego for a sister weekend!
I remember fondly the days when she would come visit as a kid and she would stay on my trundle bed in my bedroom. As she got older and started living with us, we would sneak our dinner into her tiny bedroom and sit at her desk to watch Extra or whatever cheesy gossip TV show was on at the time. She is 6 years older than me and when I was younger we went through our different stages. I’m sure at first, I just thought she was cool because she was older and frankly, she liked having me around, or so I thought. As we both started to get older and she went into high school, she still did a really good job of keeping me involved and I’m sure that didn’t help me at all because I was already trying to act so much older than I was. I remember some crazy times hanging with her and her friends, things I won’t go into detail about because I believe that our parentals are reading this post Needless to say, we had fun together and we had a really cool relationship for two siblings with such a large age difference.
When Tara left for college I was devastated, I remember taking her to USD to help move in and being jealous of her college roommate that she got my sister every day and I no longer did. For some crazy reason, our parents let me spend a few spring breaks with her in San Diego, they were a blast, but I have no freaking idea what my parents were thinking. I had ZERO business hanging out with the college kids when I was still trying to act so much older than I was. Over the years, I grew up and apart from my sister. I moved away with my mom, and went to college myself. I remember there being a few years there where we almost never spoke. I’m not sure if that was because I was so self-involved or if we were just in such different places in our lives that we really didn’t have much to talk about.
Then I went to Chicago. While I was there my sister was pregnant with Mr. B, the coolest nephew ever! I would call her almost every day before I reported to work and she would tell me all about her pregnancy and how she was feeling. I remember sitting in that Embassy Suites lobby eating my breakfast and being in total awe of the life change that my sister was going through and I couldn’t wait to get back to meet the little guy. I even used her as an excuse for me to not move to Chicago, I couldn’t imagine living so far away from her and my soon to be nephew and I wanted to make sure I was back in time for all of the action. I ended up coming home in February of that year and B was born in April. Something happened though and I would be lying to all of you if I tried to tell you what it was. I never went to see her. A year went by and I never met my nephew. The anger, I’m sure, was being kept quiet from my sister’s side but she had to wonder what happened to me? Why I didn’t want to come meet the best thing that had ever happened to her and why I wasn’t there to support HER in such a special time in her life.
As the years went on, we started to try again. Don’t get me wrong, we went through a few bumps as I met Jayson and started my life with him but it was clear that we were starting to put the last few years behind us and remember why we were so close as kids.
Fast forward a few years and here we are, as close as we were when we were kids, except now we have kids of our own. It’s so fun to have a sister that you consider a friend but even more fun to consider her your best friend. She is a voice of reason when I need it (Which is often), she loves my kids almost as much as I do, and she can even put up with my Mr.
Relationships are hard, even relationships with family, but in the case of me and my sister, everything that we have gone through over the years has brought us to where we are today and I wouldn’t trade that for the world. Some of my favorite weekends are spent with her and her family and when you throw in Tyler, my brother, and Shay, it is always so much fun. Jokes told with love, poking fun at old stories and mistakes and really just enjoying family.
So, as I pack up my two children under two and drive the 3 hours to San Diego, I can’t help but be excited for my kids. They get to have this with one another. They get to grow up and have whatever relationship they choose to, but they will always have each other. And more importantly, they will always remember long weekends spent with aunts and uncles and cousins because family is the most important thing in the world and when everybody else walks away, your family is always standing there with open arms ready to help and ready to forgive and ready to love.